People tell me that listening to dark or sad music will make my depression worse. But honestly it’s the happy music that makes me worse. Cause I can’t relate to the happy music. And that makes me more depressed. Sad/ dark music. I can relate to, I can understand where the artist is coming from. I know I’m not alone in my sadness. But not everyone understands that.
What’s it like to not be depressed, always ready to face the day? To see a world of color, instead of black and gray? To never have a worry, to never have a care. I wish we all could be there. Let me tell you how it feels, feels to be depressed. It is so much more that just being sad, that could you have guessed? Some days it’s feeling so numb, you have to hurt to feel. You get so caught up in your own mind, you forget what’s even real. Other days you feel so much, it takes your breath away. You want to tell someone, but you don’t know if they’ll stay. It’s waking up from restless sleep more tired than you were. Going through everyday living in a blur. It’s mornings you don’t want to get out of bed, wishing rather that you were dead. It’s all those tears no one saw you cry, saying your fine but it’s all a lie. Feeling like a burden cause you can’t laugh or smile, knowing people will get tired of your sadness, after awhile. It’s hurting yourself just to feel alive, peoole say it’s for attention, but it’s how we survive. So don’t go telling us that we are mad, depression is so much more than just being sad.
Do you ever get so overwhelmed with internal pain, that you can’t breathe and your chest hurts? You long for a way to get rid of that feeling. You’ve been on the verge of a mental breakdown for days and you just want to sleep forever.Everything seems to be against you. Does anyone else feel like this?
I wish people would realize that when you have depression, you don’t need a reason to be sad or tired. Sometimes the sadness just gets really bad out of nowhere. Triggered by nothing. And most days just trying to get through leaves you so tired. A tired sleep doesn’t fix. And you’re left feeling as though your feelings aren’t real. Cause if someone where to ask you what’s wrong? You’d have no answer. You don’t know what’s wrong. But you wish you did. You wish you knew why some days you feel so sad and lost, that jumping off a bridge seems so much better. Other days you’re just so tired, drained from life and sadness, that you don’t even want to get out of bed. On days like these, just hold on. Be strong! You will get through it. I BELIEVE IN YOU!
Love. If you ask someone what love is, what do you think they’d say?
This is what I think love is:
L. Learning, learning to care for someone deeply no matter what they’ve done, no matter there flaws or short comings.
O. One, when you love someone, you two become one, equal. And no body should be able to separate you.
V. Value, in order for love to work. You must value each other and your relationship. Without value, what is it to you?
E. Emotion, love is as we all know, emotional. But without emotion we can’t love. Emotions help us feel, feel love, compassion, happiness, for someone.
Comment your definition of Love.
Broken crayons still color.
And all crayons are needed to draw a complete picture. So whether you are everyone’s favorite crayon, or the most forgotten crayon. Your still needed.
Tired? I am. Then sleep you might say. But you see it’s the kind of tired sleep can’t fix. It’s the tired of breathing, of fighting of existing. It’s from fighting a battle with your own mind 24/7.
Are you one of those people who can feel others emotions? Like when their sad you become sad, when their hurting you hurt, or when they are happy you are happy? Strange isn’t it? I think it is a curse and also a blessing to be one of these people. Lets start with the positive, the blessing: you get to share more deeply there joy and laughter. When your Down there happiness can brighten your day! The curse: sometimes because you feel their hurt, grief or pain so intensely, it feels like your carrying a huge weight on your shoulders. It’s especially hard when you don’t know how to comfort this person.
Depression, it feels like your drowning. But not in water, in your thoughts. Your thoughts start small, but slowly become more overwhelming until you can’t breathe. Your thoughts keep telling you; your not worth it, no one even cares, your better off dead. And they get louder and louder till you can’t ignore them. You have no choice but to listen. And you hear those lies so many times, that you start to believe them. The thing is someone can be drowning in there thoughts, but no one can tell. That’s the things with depression. It’s like a silent killer.